Webster’s defines… no, wait. That isn’t it. Woody Allen described it as “sex with someone I love”. And boy is it! Is it ever.
You’ve had a long day. He’s already obliged you twice. He’s sleepy. You’re not. What’s a girl to do? Take matters into your own hands. Or a toy. Or a shower massage.
Don’t just sit there all frustrated. You’ll feel much better. Your skin will glow. You’ll sleep like a baby. And you’re way less likely to a bitch tomorrow.
It’ also the cheapest date you’ll ever go on. With the added benefits of no STDs.
I come here time and time again.
(That was a first – it was quite popular. I’m rewriting it through memory.)
You’ve had a long day. He’s already obliged you twice. He’s sleepy. You’re not. What’s a girl to do? Take matters into your own hands. Or a toy. Or a shower massage.
Don’t just sit there all frustrated. You’ll feel much better. Your skin will glow. You’ll sleep like a baby. And you’re way less likely to a bitch tomorrow.
It’ also the cheapest date you’ll ever go on. With the added benefits of no STDs.
I come here time and time again.
(That was a first – it was quite popular. I’m rewriting it through memory.)
Speaking of wankers... May I get my hard work back yet? Thank you and do rent a trailor tractor to get the needle out of your ass. You might feel better.
Fond regards,
M.
2 comments:
You are brash & tacky but at the same time there is an intrinsic appeal about you. Perhaps it is your unbridled feminine sexual energy. Keep your creative hand stroking! Wink wink.
Eric
Brash and tacky? I'll take it.
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